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The Daily Reckless
August 2001 Archive

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WHEN JEFFREY MET BIGGSY (published August 4 2001)
Exclusive pics

Click here for full moving movie

 

SUNDAY PROUST LAUNCHED (published August 11 2001)
More merriment for the masses

The Daily Reckless is proud to announce the launch of its new sister paper, The Sunday Proust.

Filling a void in the market for top quality reportage of a Sunday type nature, the Proust hopes to satiate those in need of yet more whimsical badinage and a chance to participate in all manner of surreal gossiping and extreme philosophy.

In order to ensure your copy, simply cut out this page from your screen and present it to your local newsagent cum butchers whilst exclaiming loudly,

'I am completely bananas and wish to reserve a copy of top notch journalistic excellence at this very boutique. I understand that everything I say may, and most definetely will, be held up to ridicule by everyone in the known universe. Thank you.'

Click here for The Sunday Proust

 

EDINBURGH SIDEBURNS 2001 (published August 11 2001)

Pure quality maaaaaaaaaaaan

The new programme for this year's cultural spectacular they call the Sideburns is available right here.

To book tickets for these events simply fold a crisp twenty pound note four times and insert briskly into your floppy drive whilst reciting the mantra, 'I need help...fast.'

We will supply a full medical team and surplus farmyard animals if you can stand the mess. Don't forget to ask the person who pays the phone bill just what exactly they think they're playing at and would it be possible for them to take over complete financial responsibilty for the running of your life till the end of all time or until they stop repeating Star Trek, whichever happens first.

Toodle pip culture clowns, and see you in the furry dorm.

Click here for programme.

 

PRAYERS ANSWERED ONLINE (published August 11 2001)
God enters the dot com race

A new service being offered by the Lord Almighty himself has been launched on the apathetic godless public.

Punters can now have their prayers answered by chatting on the internet to the man upstairs.

A spokesangel for the deity's law firm Hap, Hazard and Messy said: 'Yes we have several bananas and we're not afraid to use them.'

Roughly translated this means that the new service is available to all at the folowing address:

God Online - Click here

YER MAW WOBBLES (published August 18 2001)
Giggling guard plays schoolboy prank on defenceless old royal person. Exclusive footage..

Click here for Wobbly Woman

GET BLOTTO! (published August 18 2001)

Gambling's Great Isn't it?

Yes, you too can join in with the scratch card game from the Reckless that's driving the nation Blotto crazy!

Just match 3 numbers and win some booze!

To claim your prize simply jot down your name and address in Swahili (backwards) on the back of the computer screen containing the winning numbers and post your monitor to:

Reckless Competitions
Reckless Towers
Reckland
IM1 RU2

Click here for Blotto card

JOLLY JIGGLING JUGGLERS (published August 25 2001)

On me 'ead son

They messing with my head. Now mess with theirs. If you've ever wanted to juggle a juggler, here's your chance. See how they play keepy uppy with their bonces...

Click here for Jolly Jugglers

FESTIVAL FLASH FLOODS (published August 25 2001)
Bring out yer dinghys

Our state of the ark camera captures all the latest action as the arts capital of the moment succumbs to sogginess on a stupendous scale...

Click here for Festival Flood Cam

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