MORE
READERS LETTERS
Have
your say -write to the editor and let rip!
The
editor welcomes your comments on the burning issues of the day. If you
have something you want to get off your chest or any other part of your
anatomy, you can contact him below.
Even
if you do not accept this one, it is now over two months since a contribution
by a reader was accepted onto the letters page of your trite, funless,
repetitive and, now, ultimately BO -RING, ego-s(h)ite. The original
concept, a parody of a newspaper we love to hate, was excellent; however
it has not developed beyond a schoolboyish attempt at milking a 'coo'
to utter exhaustion - and reader fatigue.
ALM
(Posted
3/12/2000)
Ooooh. Get her! Methinks someone has been partaking of the pompous
ass pills. What do you think readers? Trite? Funless? Schoolboyish?
Cripes. Us? Bum snotters jobbies to you, A.
Hey
Capt Boab,
How's it gaun? The site's a hoot (and that's not easy to say with this
much drink under your belt). I particularly like R2, for its incisive
fluff and pithy fashion news, though it does not carry as many pictures
of birds in their pants as do some other publications. You should bring
out a hard-copy edition, by the way. I was going to say it would sell
like hot cakes, but since no one sells hot cakes any more, I do not
think that a clever analogy. Better perhaps to say it would sell like
condoms at the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland.
Honk-honk,
Rab
(Posted
14/12/2000)
Cheers.
Incidentally, Rab, you'll be delighted to know that we now have loads
of pictures of birds in their pants in our new 2001
calendar.
Dear
Boab
Who is ALM? A Labour Minister/Moron perchance? As far as I can tell
the original concept hasn't changed and has indeed developed to include
the excellent R2. I utterly resent LM's feeble attempt to undermine
such a great wee read. Could ALMs utter exhaustion have more to do with
sticking closely to Teflon men ?
Yours
Outraged of Partick
(Posted
18/12/2000)
Sir
Has anyone noticed the remarkable resemblance between the erstwhile
ejukashun minister, Ah'm Yer Man and a medical dummy head representing
facial muscle and tissues?
A
surgeon
(Posted
27/1/2001)
Sir
I am delighted to see that you have not lowered your impeccable standards
by reporting any morsel of information from the football on Sunday.
As is now commonplace in the rest of "gutter press", no respect for
the feelings of Rangers fans is shown in what is a very difficult time
for us..........eh, them. These so called "newspapers" are only interested
in cashing in on the misery of others by reporting stories that no-one
is really interested in. Thank GOD that your paper has displayed it's
sensitivity to this matter.
Yours
Faithfully
Columbus Knight
(Posted
14/2/2001)
Sir
I am struck by the remarkable resemblance between eminent historian,
Dr David Starkey and local shop owner from the League of Gentlemen,
Edward Reece. Are they related?
Curious
from Tillicoultry (and who wouldn't be)
(Posted 3/3/2001)
Remarkable,
indeed, Curious. They would appear to both be related to pigs.
Regarding
the culling of Tory politicians for being ugly - Labour had better pray
they're not next - 'cos the party with the smallest gene pool on this
or any other planet has clearly suffered from all those years of inbreeding
between all the Labourite families to ensure their safe council seats
from parent to offspring go to those of the "right background".
Just look (if you dare) at Wendy Alexander, who fell out of the ugly
tree & hit every branch on the way down. Everyone has a right to be
hideous, but as in all matters she badly abuses the privilege. Where's
the nearest bolt gun & quicklime mass burial pit?
Yours
for every politician up against the nearest wall & shot
Mark Boyle.
(Posted
5/4/2001)
Aw - we think Wendy's cute in an intriguing Ripley's
Believe it or Not way
Dear
Editor,
What is it about this day and age that forces people (like yersel) to
constantly muck around with formulas that work! Your new layout does
not look like a newspaper at all and consequently I find myself doubting
that what you write is either true or pertinent (I like that last word
so I just threw it in there).
You have shaken my faith in your online newspaper causing me to doubt
whether there is actually such a thing as "news" at all! Has this been
a conspiracy all along, is it possible that because there is not such
a thing as news you are making it all up?
Please tell me NO, as I live my life according to the bible that is
the Daily Reckless and would hate to have to resume buying the Scotsman
or God forgive the Herald, as I know that they use their mediums to
propogate and spout the awfullest shite?
regards
Shamus Notroo
(Posted
9/5/2001)
Dear
Shamus, We thought long and hard about changing the look of the Reckless
and while our experimentations have upset some traditionalists, we believe
our commitment to real News (yes, Shamus, it really is really real)
co-exists with the other funky Hi-Tech stuff. So pick and choose whatever
you like out of the newly expanded Reckless - it's free you know, unlike
those other rags you mention.
Sir
Has anyone noticed the remarkable resemblance between the future prime
minister of England and a rubber latex puppet?
yours
Vic Tishus
(Posted
9/6/2001)
Cripes,
you're right, Vic. The Tory Party seem to be infiltrated by sci fi characters.
Think of Mekon Hague, Redwood (another Spock) and Ann Widdecombe (any
scary monster you care to mention)
write
to the editor
