ARIES - You're
going to be dead rich this week. Great eh!
TAURUS -You're
going to be dead this week - Aw!
GEMINI - Look
out for that articulated lorry!
CANCER - Don't
buy any long playing records.
LEO- Because
you're a lion, you'll be eating zebra this week.
VIRGO - Dead
exciting stuff's going to happen to you. Honest.
LIBRA - Did you
put the cat out?
SCORPIO- Did
you turn the gas off?
SAGITTARIUS - What
were you thinking?
CAPRICORN - Where
are your manners?
AQUARIUS - Are
they your slippers?
PISCES - My god
have you really read this far?
The
lifestyle magazine for people who quite frankly could do without that sort
of thing thank you very much.